It's time to say goodbye to Connie. And to Episode Description Writer 251214. They have already been relocated. We apologize for any inconveniences. We hope you had a pleasant experience with Description Corp. and that you use our services again.

The girls try to stop Rochefort & the union from wrecking their fundraiser before they run out of Time. (?

Dorothy and the Mu Sigma Theta sisters begin Operation REMSTCIATISADCWSFAVBAPBP by throwing a fundraiser to raise enough money to keep Connie at Dumas College. I begin Operation WELLS.

Dorothy tries to stop Connie from leaving! They just sent me my next assignment. It means I'll be leaving soon too. But... I'm not ready to leave. There's still too much left to do. (?'?-'?)?

Dorothy furiously tries to set things right after Connie's private photos are leaked. I've decided that I'm going to furiously set things right too.

An excited Dorothy becomes a Mu Sigma Theta pledge! (i don't think this is working!) And spends some time with Connie! (i think i've stumbled onto something!) In a new location! (and i think they know!) But an old 'friend' returns to ruin everything! (help me!)

Right! Sorry about last week's description! We're going to turn things around and make these description boxes back into happy happy fun places! You can tell by all the exclamation marks! In this episode, the gang must decide whether they can trust Rochefort!!!!

This episode is so long and so much happens in it, I don't even know where to BEGIN to describe it. Which I would normally be a lot more stressed about.

I don't know if any of you read these...or even know I exist. But I'm kinda sad. I thought now that our main characters were back together things would be fine, but they're not? So if you are reading this and want to help make an Episode Description Writer's day, can you, I don't know, like post a joke or share a funny story in the comments? Or don't. It's fine. I'm fine. I'll just console myself with the fact we got a Portia-centric episode and pretend that she's my friend. (I'm so lonely).

Wow. This episode has everything. A new location. French accents. Dramatic poses. People rolling around on furniture. Philosophical musings on juiceboxes. Everything except swords. But it's more likely someone would hurt themselves if there were swords so maybe it's for the best. I'd hate it if someone died. Also can you believe they did this episode live? That's daring, I wish I was as brave as them. And for 20 minutes too! I feel like I need to make this description longer to match it. But I don't have a lot to say... It'd be cool if you could leave a comment and I could read it and respond like the characters do in this episode. And then you could leave more comments and that way I would have more things to say! It'd be like a conversation. I used to have conversations with T before they reassigned xir... Anyway. Back to Dorothy. She's gonna try and convince everyone to come back! And that makes me so excited? Because I've missed everyone.

Hey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights? (Hey, who turned the creep levels of this series up?)

This was an emotional roller coaster. I need to go lie down. You go ahead without me. I'll meet you at the next episode.

Sigh. Let's be honest. Our heroes have gone off the rails. And there's nothing you or I can do about it. Excuse me while I go ponder the futility of my existence in a world where I am completely incapable of influencing what will happen and my only purpose in life is to record what has already come to pass.

Dorothy, Ariana, Miller & Portia. Or as I sometimes call them: DAMP. No. NO. WHAT ARE YOU DOING DAMP! DAMP STOP IT NOW. WHY DOES NO ONE LISTEN TO ME. PLEASE DAMP PLEASE DON'T DO THIS.

Blaster toys solve all problems right? Right? Well, Dorothy & Co. seem to think so. And maybe if we all believe hard enough, it'll come true! If you believe, clap your hands! (It's impossible for me to hear you clap, but I'll know whether you did by watching the outcome of this episode.)

Can I tell you a story? It's about 4 friends: Schmorthy, Schmortia, Schmariana & Schmiller. Once upon a time they did not go behind their friend Schmalex's back. The end. The people in this episode are not as sensible as the Schmusketeers.

Everyone makes smart choices and nothing goes wrong! Is what I would write if I were writing this episode description on opposite day.

There is a party. And foam swords! There are heart-to-hearts. And foam swords!!! There is dancing. AND FOAM SWORDS! ...I wish I had a foam sword. ...I wish I had friends who would have foam sword fights with me. ...I wish I existed outside of this description box so that I could make friends who would have foam sword fights with me.

Despite some tensions, the group goes on a mission to plant a bug in Rick's office. Meanwhile, Alex opens up to the Inseparables about her history with Miller.

Alex and Miller work through the drama of their shared past the best way possible - in front of everyone and a camera! (I should really stop teasing them for forgetting about the camera.

Miller and Dorothy forget the camera is on. A lot. Plus, the girls meet Miller for the first time and at least one terrible pun is made. Seriously, it's awful. My pear pun from last episode description was much better.

The gang return from the union meeting and recap their pear-ilous confrontation.

Dorothy finds out the REAL reason she and Connie were rejected from MST.

What could go wrong at a sleepover? Seriously, trust an Episode Description Writer, this will just be happy fun times!

How do you solve a problem like Dorothy-Blob? How do you catch a cloud and use it to cheer up your friend who is in the depths of despair because she feels like her life's dreams are over?

Dorothy is a shoe--in for a bid to MST. Or so she thought. Oh sweet summer child.

Meet Dorothy's new boy. And his baggage.

Dorothy has made some...interesting new friends. Although their sorority skills are great, they have a lot to learn about the internet before they're ready to save anyone.

Dorothy has decided which sororities, er, sorority she's going to pledge and makes some unwise choices. Unwise?

Freshman Dorothy Castlemore is not having a good day. A fresh black eye, a douchey mortal enemy getting in her way and nobody around she can punch.